Jackassery Junction -- Joke of the Day!

Everything that doesn't fit anywhere else!

Postby Pit♥bull » January 13th, 2009, 10:20 pm

When southern Florida resident Nathan Radlich's house was burglarized recently, thieves ignored his wide screen plasma TV, his VCR, and even left his Rolex watch. What they did take, however, was 'a generic white cardboard box filled with a grayish-white powder.' (That's the way the police report described it.)

A spokesman for the Fort Lauderdale police said, 'that it looked similar to high grade cocaine and they'd probably thought they'd hit the big time.' Later, Nathan stood in front of numerous TV cameras and pleaded with the burglars: 'Please return the cremated remains of my sister, Gertrude. She died three years ago.'

The next morning, the bullet-riddled corpse of a local drug dealer known as Hoochie Pevens was found on Nathan's doorstep. The cardboard box was there too; about half of Gertrude's ashes remained.

Scotch taped to the box was this note which said:
Hoochie sold us the bogus blow, so we wasted Hoochie. Sorry we snorted your sister. No hard feelings. Have a nice day.


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Postby Marinepits » January 13th, 2009, 10:50 pm

:eek1: LMAO
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Postby Jenn » January 13th, 2009, 10:56 pm

:squint: No freaking way!!! lmao
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Postby mnp13 » January 13th, 2009, 11:04 pm

Michelle

Inside me is a thin woman trying to get out. I usually shut the bitch up with a martini.
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Postby cheekymunkee » January 13th, 2009, 11:06 pm

Bwahahahah! Hoochie! :D
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Postby Pit♥bull » January 14th, 2009, 5:24 pm

LMAO
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Postby pitbullmamaliz » January 14th, 2009, 5:33 pm

:spit:
"Remember - every time your dog gets somewhere on a tight leash *a fairy dies and it's all your fault.* Think of the fairies." http://www.positivepetzine.com"

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Postby delilahsmommy » January 14th, 2009, 5:54 pm

lol ok....
some people just dont get it...
and some shouldnt
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Postby Klopfer » January 15th, 2009, 9:16 am

What a great story!! Image Image
They say "fighting dogs" grab on and never let go; and it's the truth! Smokey grabbed my heart and never let go.

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Postby ArtGypsy » January 15th, 2009, 9:50 am

mnp13 wrote:http://www.snopes.com/horrors/cannibal/cocaine.asp
:D



I love Snopes!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Anger that things are the way they are.
Courage to make them the way they ought to be.”----Augustine
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Postby Pit♥bull » January 15th, 2009, 9:59 am

ArtGypsy wrote:I love Snopes!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jody
I love Snopes toooo, I'm shocked the OP didn't check with them before posting. :| :oops:
LMAO
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Postby Pit♥bull » January 17th, 2009, 9:13 am



A Real Louisiana Cajun walks into a Texas bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive Texas Cowgirl wearing skin-tight jeans. He gives her a quick glance then casually looks at his watch for a moment.

The Cowgirl notices he is from Louisiana by his LSU ball cap and asks, "Is your little swamp girl running late?"

"Oh no," he replies, "I just got me dis state-of the-art watch, and was just testing it."

The intrigued Cowgirl says, "A state-of-the-art watch? What's so special about it?"

The Cajun explains, "Dey tell me it use a alpha wave to talk to me, how dey say dat, telepathically."

The Texas lady says, "Oh yeah, what's it telling you now?"

"Well, it say you ain't wearing no panties."

The Cowgirl giggles and replies, "Well it must be broken... you cute little Coon-Ass... because I AM wearing panties!"

The Cajun smiles, taps his watch and says........ "Damnnnn, dis ting's running an hour fass!"


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Postby pitbullmamaliz » January 17th, 2009, 9:15 am

lol
"Remember - every time your dog gets somewhere on a tight leash *a fairy dies and it's all your fault.* Think of the fairies." http://www.positivepetzine.com"

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Postby ArtGypsy » January 17th, 2009, 9:34 am

Too Funny!! 8)
“Hope has two beautiful daughters: their names are Anger and Courage.
Anger that things are the way they are.
Courage to make them the way they ought to be.”----Augustine
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Postby Pit♥bull » January 17th, 2009, 9:54 am

:shock:
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Postby Jenn » January 17th, 2009, 10:01 am

lol
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure....
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Postby pitbullmamaliz » January 17th, 2009, 10:14 am

Bob, you're so silly! rofl
"Remember - every time your dog gets somewhere on a tight leash *a fairy dies and it's all your fault.* Think of the fairies." http://www.positivepetzine.com"

http://www.pitbullzen.com
http://inaradog.wordpress.com
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Postby TheRedQueen » January 17th, 2009, 10:15 am

:lol3:
"I don't have any idea if my dogs respect me or not, but they're greedy and I have their stuff." -- Patty Ruzzo

"Dogs don't want to control people. They want to control their own lives." --John Bradshaw
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Postby cheekymunkee » January 17th, 2009, 4:41 pm

LMAO
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Postby madremissy » January 17th, 2009, 4:52 pm

:giggle:
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