by Suzi » November 30th, 2009, 2:15 pm
Being a bit of an older woman,,,,I have loved and lost a few....They have all left their pawprints on my heart,,,,and are still directly attached to my soul. I to made a comment after I lost my girl Rosie,,,I will never have another dog,,,as the pain is to great.....Well,,,,my daughter "earned" her way into getting a puppy (Bella). The pain, I found never dissapears for good,,,we can never replace that love we have, or had for the others,,,,or erase their memories.....But,,,,,,the true gift of the ones we have lost,,,is what they have taught us,,,and what they have given. Through the years I now realize,,,Bogart taught me responsibility,,,,he gave to me love,,,and so much patience. Kaiser's strenghth was loyalty,, protection and love. He taught me that, it is sometimes better to look before you leap,,,and that it is good to go slow into friendships...Cyanne,,,helped me to learn team work,,,and how to go slow and be gentle,,,that in time, trust can be built,,,,it takes love. Rommel,,,well,,,he taught me it's ok to be goofy,,,and not to always "read between the lines",,,take a chance,,,to try new things... Rosebud (Rosie) was my first Pit Bull,,,,she was the first one I got adopted by after I said I could never have another dog.....Rosie, taught me how to deal with fear of the unknown (I to was one of those folks who "feared" Pit Bulls),,,,she taught me about predjudice, how hurtful and unfair it is,,,how not to be judgmental,,,,when she got up in years (she passed at 19),,,she showed me that with age,,,that we must slow down and smell the roses,,,how good it feels on a sunny day to just lay in the sun or sit around a warm fire and enjoy the peace,,,the smells,,,and the sounds of birds chirping,,,,rivers running,,,,kids playing,,,or just silence...She taught me fortitude, and perserverance no matter what obstacles that may appear before us.. Sometimes we cannot see through the fog until pressed to do so.
Now for Bella.....She is my current family member. She brought joy back into my heart,,,brings so much laughter to myself as well as anyone who meets her. Bella is the ultimate "class clown". She has, and is currently teaching me organization,,,insistant on getting enough exersize every day,,,that being social is very important,,,and needs to be done every week at least a time or two. Bella is fighting cancer right now,,,and I am ringside with her,,,so now I am learning nutrition,,not to squaler in tears and depression (time can be short let's have fun damn-it!),,,,,that having a dog is a very integural part of my life,,,through her,,,I have made new connections in my life, that I am not alone,,,,,I have learned what BSL stands for. I have a feeling my learning curve is just beginning.
My dogs have given me so much. I just hope that they have felt the same towards me. I think they did.
I've learned unconditional love,,,how to be a better parent,,,how to enjoy life. I can't say that after Bella's time is done here,,,that I won't get another dog,,,as they say you grow old when you stop learning....What wonderful teachers/educator's they are!
This is an awsome thread for so many reasons...First and foremost it gives time for reflection, which leads to taking a walk down Memory Lane,,,whether it brings tears or smiles,,,we are human,,,it is OK to grieve,,,,it's ok to NEVER forget. We are not alone,,,,in time the pain will subside, and although a tear may still come from time to time,,,,hopefully smiles surface to,,,,remembering the good times we've all shared,,,the tough times we've survived through.....It's all good in a bittersweet way.
Off my podium.......Happychick,,, *hugs*,,,thanks again for starting this thread,,,For all of us,that are in the middle,,take time with the grieving process, each step is very important to get to the final stage of acceptance,,,then healing.
Time to dry my tears (I still miss all of them dearly) and go play a game of Tug....